Emily and I were in Panera waiting for our food when this happened...
Guy walks up to the counter and stares at the display with his mouth open. He points to a bin full of bagels with a big sign that says "French Toast."
Guy: Are those french toast bagels?
Poor Cashier Girl: Yes
Guy: What do they taste like?
PCG: (confused, but very polite) Uh, french toast. And bagel.
Guy: (long pause) I'll take a blueberry bagel with cream cheese.
I was chuckling at his questions, then laughing out loud when he didn't order the french toast bagel. What was he hoping she would say? They taste like pancakes? Blueberry bagels? Seared tuna?
This also reminds me of the time I was at Blockbuster and the lady in front of me said to the cashier, "I'm looking for this movie...Will Smith is in it...he plays a black guy."
Oooh, I haven't seen that one.
Showing posts with label Schlock. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Schlock. Show all posts
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Friday, June 5, 2009
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Sweet Links
Looking for hastily conceived legal opinions? Scroll backwards through the blog and you should see a bevy of seemingly new posts, outlining my current understanding of The Law.
For the recovering music majors...
This guy spends 20 minutes explaining to normal people why they should be listening to classical music. It's strangely riveting.
For the new and soon-to-be parents out there...
Your kid may be smarter than mine. Your kid will likely be taller than mine. But my kid is going to know how to throw a spear. And a well thrown spear can make all the difference.
For the Crossfitters...
Melissa Byers makes me laugh. OL!
For the lovers of peaceful, ethereal music...
A nice Sigur Ros video. Speaking of strangely riveting: people from Iceland.
For the lovers of oldtime...
If you like this you should hear J & E cover it. We blow it out!
Enjoy your weekend. Go Cavs.
For the recovering music majors...
This guy spends 20 minutes explaining to normal people why they should be listening to classical music. It's strangely riveting.
For the new and soon-to-be parents out there...
Your kid may be smarter than mine. Your kid will likely be taller than mine. But my kid is going to know how to throw a spear. And a well thrown spear can make all the difference.
For the Crossfitters...
Melissa Byers makes me laugh. OL!
For the lovers of peaceful, ethereal music...
A nice Sigur Ros video. Speaking of strangely riveting: people from Iceland.
For the lovers of oldtime...
If you like this you should hear J & E cover it. We blow it out!
Enjoy your weekend. Go Cavs.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
All Work And No Play...
I've been a bad, bad blogger. On the plus side, life has been a blast the last few weeks! Updates on the way.
...
Odds and Ends
-My phone has been acting squirrelly. I've been missing calls and texts for at least a couple of weeks. Also, I can't check my voicemail. If I appear to be ignoring you, that's my excuse. I can't get a new phone on the cheap until the 23rd. Try emailing me. Also, PAY FOR INSURANCE ON YOUR CELL PHONE! You have no idea what I've been through.
-My amateur opinion is that if the "facts" presented in the news are true, Donte Stallworth is going to prison. It should be interesting to see how his lawyer attempts to "vigorously defend" against this charge.
-It's a boy!
-Jeff Goldblum joins the cast of Law & Order this Sunday at 9pm. My expectations are high.
-Calling my shot: Lakers over Cavs in 6. Hope I'm wrong.
-What legal issue do you want me to research and write about? Leave a comment or shoot me an email?
...
Odds and Ends
-My phone has been acting squirrelly. I've been missing calls and texts for at least a couple of weeks. Also, I can't check my voicemail. If I appear to be ignoring you, that's my excuse. I can't get a new phone on the cheap until the 23rd. Try emailing me. Also, PAY FOR INSURANCE ON YOUR CELL PHONE! You have no idea what I've been through.
-My amateur opinion is that if the "facts" presented in the news are true, Donte Stallworth is going to prison. It should be interesting to see how his lawyer attempts to "vigorously defend" against this charge.
-It's a boy!
-Jeff Goldblum joins the cast of Law & Order this Sunday at 9pm. My expectations are high.
-Calling my shot: Lakers over Cavs in 6. Hope I'm wrong.
-What legal issue do you want me to research and write about? Leave a comment or shoot me an email?
Monday, February 2, 2009
New Deal intro
A recent cover of Time magazine really intrigued me. There is an interesting similarity between President Obama and President Roosevelt. They both entered the White House with the benefit and burden of a massive public demand for economic solutions.
FDR was able to quickly enact "New Deal" legislation to stimulate the economy. His Democratic party had significant Congressional majority, and his policies sailed through. Wikipedia says that during his first 100 days in office, Congress granted every request Roosevelt made.
There is much debate over the effectiveness of The New Deal. Many liberals contend that increasing spending and expanding government saved the country. Conservatives argue that FDR's actions only prolonged the Great Depression; even worse, this ideology smacked of socialism.
I'm not here to throw political poop, but we are going to talk about New Deal legislation over the next two posts. My guess is that we are going to see great examples of the balance of power in American government. For the 1930s Republican, FDR's political capital and the Democratic majority in Congress were a scary combination. SCOTUS was a last line of defense against overreaching liberal policy. More recently, President Bush enjoyed a Republican Congress for much of his presidency. Again, the Supreme Court's job was to keep the GOP from taking things too far.
The salient point of the "Obama is a 21st century FDR" analogy is the power to change. Obama is very popular, as evidenced by his 62% approval rating. Democrats have a nice majority in both the Senate and the House. Our President has inherited the second half of Bush's $750 billion T.A.R.P. bill, and his own $800 billion stimulus package is winding through Congress. In short, get ready for a lot of liberal policy to be enacted.
If you are a liberal, that sounds great. It sounds like "change we can believe in." If you are not a liberal, that taste in the back of your throat is probably your breakfast. On the bright side for non-liberals, there is always the Supreme Court. Seven of the nine justices were appointed by Republican presidents. As we will see tomorrow, you only need 5 men in funny robes to defeat the President, Senate, and House combined.
---
It's a big day for Jay's Legal Boom. I used my first semicolon! I'm not going to lie, it felt good. Someone (Sean?) let me know if I nuked it.
FDR was able to quickly enact "New Deal" legislation to stimulate the economy. His Democratic party had significant Congressional majority, and his policies sailed through. Wikipedia says that during his first 100 days in office, Congress granted every request Roosevelt made.
There is much debate over the effectiveness of The New Deal. Many liberals contend that increasing spending and expanding government saved the country. Conservatives argue that FDR's actions only prolonged the Great Depression; even worse, this ideology smacked of socialism.
I'm not here to throw political poop, but we are going to talk about New Deal legislation over the next two posts. My guess is that we are going to see great examples of the balance of power in American government. For the 1930s Republican, FDR's political capital and the Democratic majority in Congress were a scary combination. SCOTUS was a last line of defense against overreaching liberal policy. More recently, President Bush enjoyed a Republican Congress for much of his presidency. Again, the Supreme Court's job was to keep the GOP from taking things too far.
The salient point of the "Obama is a 21st century FDR" analogy is the power to change. Obama is very popular, as evidenced by his 62% approval rating. Democrats have a nice majority in both the Senate and the House. Our President has inherited the second half of Bush's $750 billion T.A.R.P. bill, and his own $800 billion stimulus package is winding through Congress. In short, get ready for a lot of liberal policy to be enacted.
If you are a liberal, that sounds great. It sounds like "change we can believe in." If you are not a liberal, that taste in the back of your throat is probably your breakfast. On the bright side for non-liberals, there is always the Supreme Court. Seven of the nine justices were appointed by Republican presidents. As we will see tomorrow, you only need 5 men in funny robes to defeat the President, Senate, and House combined.
---
It's a big day for Jay's Legal Boom. I used my first semicolon! I'm not going to lie, it felt good. Someone (Sean?) let me know if I nuked it.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Legal Writing in Plain English
"Some people have a way with words. Other people...uh...oh, uh...not having way."
~Steve Martin, although I'm sort of para-quoting
I'll be working through Legal Writing in Plain English and posting what I learn on The Boom. I have high hopes for this book to really improve my writing. You, gentle reader, should be excited too. In 6 months my posts are going to be so good you'll have an eyegasm every time you read Jay's Legal Boom.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Do you know what a mandamus is?
Okay, I'll admit it. I was feeling pretty cocky after my first few days studying the law. It just wasn't all that hard. A little light reading and some critical thinking. No problem.
Then I sat down to breeze through Marbury v. Madison.
It sucked. It made absolutely no sense to me. I even downloaded a different copy to make sure I wasn't getting punked. I knew it was going to be bad after the very first paragraph, when I had to ask Amos what the hell a "mandamus" was.
I quit after about 30 minutes. It's going to take me at least a few days to grind this one out.
On the bright side this is exactly why I started learning the law now instead of waiting until I actually got to law school. My gut told me I wasn't ready to read material this dense. Chalk another one up for my gut.
At least I don't have to worry about writing, since I are so good at it.
Then I sat down to breeze through Marbury v. Madison.
It sucked. It made absolutely no sense to me. I even downloaded a different copy to make sure I wasn't getting punked. I knew it was going to be bad after the very first paragraph, when I had to ask Amos what the hell a "mandamus" was.
I quit after about 30 minutes. It's going to take me at least a few days to grind this one out.
On the bright side this is exactly why I started learning the law now instead of waiting until I actually got to law school. My gut told me I wasn't ready to read material this dense. Chalk another one up for my gut.
At least I don't have to worry about writing, since I are so good at it.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Thumbs UP!
Bolla 2007 Pinot Noir (on sale for $5.99 at Giant Eagle)
Ryan Lassiter-For buying us Planet Earth
LaLaLaLori-For delicious lilac cupcakes
The new season of Top Chef
My Blackberry smartphone provided by Alltel
Ryan Lassiter-For buying us Planet Earth
LaLaLaLori-For delicious lilac cupcakes
The new season of Top Chef
My Blackberry smartphone provided by Alltel
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Thumbs UP!
Taja Jumilla Reserva 2003
Cigars, deep cherries...a hint of mint. ~Jerome
Mmmm. ~Lori
Awesome. ~Jason
Yummy. ~Emily
Cigars, deep cherries...a hint of mint. ~Jerome
Mmmm. ~Lori
Awesome. ~Jason
Yummy. ~Emily
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